I visited a cardiologist this week and was diagnosed with PVCs (Premature ventricular contractions.) The doctor took a lot of time with me and attempted to explain the complicated heart and ventricle electrical system. Even with his drawings and lengthy description I didn’t understand. And, I decided that I didn’t need to understand, but he did and I told him so. I didn’t think there was a chance that I’d understand in a short office visit all the intricate things he learned during medical school. I was comforted by the amount of information he had and his full understanding of it.
4 Then you will win favor and a good name
in the sight of God and man.
5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
—Proverbs 3:4-6 NIV
In the doctor’s office, I decided to not lean on my understanding and it was a relief. The following day, I had lunch with my friend. She has spent the last 7 months dealing with breast cancer and surgeries. She is an adoptive mom friend of mine who adopted because she was unable to have biological children of her own due to cancer in her youth. She adopted two children from hard places (aka foster care, trauma, unknown backgrounds) who have serious mental health issues and her life is anything but easy. She shared with me that the doctors said her cancer may return within two years and possibly it will return in her lungs. She said this and then went on to describe the temper tantrum her boys had the day before, the calls from the school and how both kids have been acting up due to the added stress in the family. Kids from trauma facing potentially more trauma is a bad combination.
On my way home from lunch, I was talking with God and wondering why she had to face so much. I don’t know anything about living with cancer, but I do know about parenting kids from hard places and I know the struggles she faces daily with that. Couldn’t God just heal those boys and allow some peace in her home? I know He could, but why won’t He? And, why won’t He now so she can focus on her health? I just don’t understand. That’s right. I don’t understand. And, guess what else? I don’t need to. “Lean not on my own understanding, acknowledge him and he will make my paths straight.” Again, I don’t need to understand, I just have to place my friend into the hands of the one who does. As much as I trust my cardiologist’s understanding, I trust God more. There is definitely comfort and relief in that!